For all the high-grossing, low-budget romance movies he turns out, director Patrick Kong is no big believer in marriage or the contemporary understanding of love. The man behind such hits as “Marriage with a Fool,” “Love is Not All Around” and the new film “Love Connected” talks to June Ng.

I come from a small family. My dad runs a small business and my mom is a housewife. 

I was never particularly masculine while growing up. I pretty much kept to myself.

I wrote stories and poems, and sent them to newspapers. 

I was never into macho male friendships, where guys go to a pub, get drunk and make random promises to each other that they never talk about again when they’re sober.

After graduating with a degree in history, I sort of became a multimedia expert. I wrote movie scripts, film reviews, interviews—all sorts of things. I even ran a website.

I could never really explain to my family what it was I did for a living, not until I became a director and made several movies. In fact, I’ve never really felt part of the movie industry at all.

Experience doesn’t matter much. The most important thing is to find a good team that can work well with you.

As a Pisces, I’m a romantic person. I have a vivid imagination but can be realistic too. It’s kind of like having a split personality. 

I believe in love, but I don’t believe in relationships. I believe in the love that comes from when two people first meet. That moment, and the chemical reaction, is real. But once a relationship develops, everything changes.  

Love fades too fast nowadays. In the past, we would talk about the seven-year itch, but now, seven months is already too long.

There is a lot of betrayal and cheating in my movies—that’s because those are just ordinary parts of reality. I never intend to portray the world as a negative place. I just want to portray what’s going on out there. I am not making judgments.

The thought of marriage is repelling to me. I get bored going to the same old banquets with the same old, dull MCs. My friends get married, buy the same kind of apartment, and have the same kind of kids. I always wonder, is that what people really want, or are they just fulfilling society’s expectations? 

Is marriage really the only path for two people who are in love?

I would rather be friends with someone than be their lover.  Relationships do not last forever, and if it ended, I’d lose the friendship too.

Admiring someone from afar is beautiful. It’s nice to have feelings for somebody, and to be secretly devoted to her without her even realizing it.

It’s tragic to be stuck in a job that is unsuitable for you. I’m lucky to be able to use my creativity to earn a living. Can you imagine the pain of being a guitarist who works nine-to-five in a bank?

The creative road is lonely, though.

If you’re gifted, then you have to accept loneliness. People think that making movies is a glamorous job, but before anything can happen, a script must be written in utter solitude.

We live too fast, but we’re too lazy to think. We are taught to accept facts, not question them.

Appreciation for your partner is crucial to sustaining a relationship. Nobody is perfect, and only when you accept that can you truly embrace someone else.